The Thirds Dork Matter

June 24, 2018


The Thirds had me at Dork Matter. The band tells us that they have filled their EP with themes that touch on self-worth, anxiety, regret, and confusion. I say, Dork Matter and its creators are way more than that. 


First off, The Thirds' list of influences sounds like me trying to order Asian burritos on Postmates when I'm higher than Giraffe penis. This is meant as a total compliment so I hope it will be taken as such. It seems their latest EP Dork Matter arrived via a space ship powered by The Beach Boys, Beatles, Dinosaur Jr., Crush 40, and the Backstreet Boys going a speed I'd like to call nerdwarp and/or Dr. Frankefurter fooling around with Wheezer carpool lane cruising speed. Again, a compliment. 


Welcome to The Thirds' contribution to whatevercore or as I like to call it, your dad's unwashed frisbee dance music. And it is glorious. These motherscratching nerds are redefining music and it's fresh is what I'm trying to say. Huzzah, musical lizard professors! 


These cute and cuddly (I'm guessing) lads are dead set on having a whimsical time while they dazzle us with their thoughts on "Antimatter" and the delightful play on the phrase statute of limitations with their "Statue of Limitations." Suffice it to say, whatever The Thirds are slinging out of their magical brains, I'm down for it. 


Before I leave you and strongly encourage you to download Dork Matter, I'd like to leave you with a line that our editor cut from this article: "The Thirds are like Workaholics with three versions of Blake where Blake is super smart." I don't know why that line didn't make it and I still stand behind it.  


Update: The editor's argument is that there cannot be three Blakes in any group or they would cancel each other out and cause a rift in the space time continuum. Fair enough. 


See them in action. Here's "Deep" 


Dork Matter Track List:

1. Buncha Nerds

2. Say A Few

3. Statue of Limitations

4. Miracle Metal

5. Maybe

6. Antimatter



Chris Saporito - Vocals, bass, and guitar

JJ Padovani - Vocals, bass, and guitar

Cody Lengel - Drums


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